The Rut

Man, I am in the rut of my life. Not the buck deer sexing up everything kind of rut either, the bad kind. I've had low motivation before, but this is almost unprecedented. I think it is time to claw my way out.

Tomorrow we flip the calendar to March. Usually, by March, I have obtained some semblance of fitness because the Moab Half Marathon is only a couple of weeks from now. But I am skipping it this year. See, Wifey had some knee issues last spring and not having run much at race registration time we didn't want to make the arrangements and then have her pain resurface. So we held off this spring, which means I held off on my winter training. And it shows.

Without the race as motivation, a few months ago I decided I was going to kick myself into training gear by growing a beard. I told myself that I would shave it off as soon as I was working out consistently again. I thought that the itch alone would force me to get my shit together.

It didn't work.

Now I have a full beard with grey streaks that not only reminds me of my failure to launch a successful fitness program but reminds my that I am getting old. Because me receding hairline wasn't effective enough at doing just that. To top it off I get a lot of compliments on the beard that serve to reinforce my sloth.

The beard didn't work either. And Smarty Pants wants me to shave it off.

LOTOJA succeeded in motivating me to a degree last year, but I should have done more. It seems like I can register for an event and just do the minimum training and feel good about the race. There really isn't any fear anymore. It's like I've half-assed my way through competing for so long and done okay, I can't scrape together the motivation to consistently work for success. Take triathlon for example, I'm not even really scared of swimming anymore, I can't even train for that like I should.

So I need a motivator. A new one. A GOOD one. I don't know if that is a new event or what. I've tried coming at this from a few different angles but nothing gets me going. Maybe I need a reward. I don't know, things to think about.