July 31, 2009

Competition vs. Participation

Before me lies a list of events I have interest in competing in. Even though tomorrow is August 1, I still have not entered a race this year. (Well, not counting two half marathons. I suppose that means something.) On the list are triathlons of varying distance, XTERRA events and some mountain bike events. I really want to compete in something this summer. I'll hate myself all winter if I don't. But what to do...

I am sorely undertrained, yet, as I mentioned in the last post, overtrained. I think I am fit enough to do anything on the list, just not as fast as I'd like. So, I could use them as training events. But training for what? That leaves me in a weird place, signing up, paying money and what's the word... not racing, not competing... oh yeah, participating. That's it, participating.

How the hell do you do that again?

Even though I hate to admit it, I am a competitor. Not that I compete to win, because I sure ain't paying the bills with my athletic prowess. I guess I just like to go out and hurt myself and go as fast as my sticks will let me. And when I'm not in shape I remember when I was in shape and get pretty down on the self.

In comes the theory of participation. Lemme get my dictionary.

See, when you are fit, racing is so awesome. You can kill it and not even realize how hard and fast you are going. Just dial it back to a comfort zone and fly. If the need arises, stomp a little harder and wheeze a bit, but then you recover and it's back to near effortless speed.

When fit, racing is like participation... but faster. I get it now. Except the slower part.

Slow isn't as much fun, so I end up really pushing myself to go faster. Which is what I did at the Ogden Half Marathon. And I paid ever so dearly for that effort. For days I paid...

Maybe it's time to make the transition to slower participation. I still like doing this stuff, but my reality is that I just ain't as good as I once was, and probably not even as good once as I ever was. But I'll suffer less and enjoy more.

Except the swimming. I frigging hate the swimming. More specifically the anxiety from swimming.

July 29, 2009

What to do, what to do...

So many events, so little time.

And so little training ... so very little training. So few miles. So few laps. The only thing I have ample of is back fat these days.

Oddly enough, I felt like I was overtraining a few weeks ago. I had ramped up the swimming, was running, lifting weights a little and biking some. It didn't seem like much, but the signs were there. I wasn't sleeping great, pissy, no motivitation. But it really hit home when I tried to climb up Trapper's Loop and it just wasn't there. I think my heart rate maxed at 147 bpm, and my legs had zero left to give. All I can figure is that it might have been the multiple workouts per day, coupled with work and other stuff might have just got to me.

I took most of a week off, other than deadlines at work, and have started back into it slowly. Some trail running with Wifey, easier bike rides (other than the singlespeed adventure), less swimming and lifting. I felt like the fitness was coming back, now I am feeling tired again. I dunno. Maybe I am just getting lazy. Maybe it is something else.

The point is, it is tough to want to pay money to enter events when I know I won't be at my best. Still, I know I will despise myself all winter if I don't do something. Of course I will despise myself now also if I try and just suck.

What to do?

Coming up is a mountain bike race I would like to do at The Canyons on August 1. August 15 is the Utah Half Triathlon. Then comes the Snowbasin 50k mountain bike race on August 22. There is the Top of Utah Half Marathon, Bear Lake Triathlon or Bear Lake 12 Hour Mountain Bike Relay all on August 29. There are a few triathlons in September that sound appealing, except for the swim part.

I still have not swum any open water this year. Which makes me wonder how I will react, and race day is not the time to find out. I was swimming pretty good until I started feeling yucky. Now I am back to square uno.


July 23, 2009


Work has been nutso the last few weeks, hence the lack of posts. I admit most of my writing is done at work, because that is what I do at work. So while I may not be writing work stuff, I am writing, and writing is a skill. This is my break. I can get away from the status quo and do what I enjoy, but in a very relaxed and free way. Which is why you will see errors and shit here. I follow rules every day, here I don't. More soon that might be considered interesting...

July 7, 2009

Another July 7th

Happy Birthday, Sis. We miss you.